TRAIN ENCOUNTER: Mutton dressed as lamb, online dating and the dodgy guy

  I must admit, I did have to scroll through my posts to make sure I had not written on this topic before, or at least for a while because it is a big bug bear of mine. I recently travelled to Scarborough from Ely (a good 3 hour trip) and during the journey I really felt somebody up there was not on my side. I was, and always am, placed near or next to the most irritating human beings to roam this planet, I mean they give you the option to choose the positioning of your seat, but I would much prefer the choice of type of people that you will be sitting near.

   The first encounter of stupid people that I came across was from a woman who defined 'mutton dressed as lamb' with the shortest mini skirt on, tattoos up her legs, knickers on show and greasy hair, shouting at the top of her lungs whilst on the phone to her husband, how cramped the train was and bragging about the fight that she almost go in earlier that day - lovely!

   My attention then turned to a blonde lady, this time nicely dressed up, aged about mid-fifties and obviously on the phone to one of her girl friends. This friend had clearly been online dating a man, since October last year (yes I know every detail despite not caring, because I had forgotten my ear phones therefore couldn't plug myself in and block out these irritating conversations)..."HOW MANY?!?! HE'S HAD 4 WIVES?!?! OOOH YOU BEST GET RID" I heard, which made me and the lad sitting opposite chuckle and tune in further to hear as the conversation got dramatic..........

   ........At this moment the lad sitting opposite me, his phone went off and he had an even louder voice than both ladies before, drowning out (quite nicely as he was good to look at) their conversations. It was his Dad and I quite fancied this lad until he opened his mouth. "Yeah just on way to Durham, only Casino i'm not barred from in the entire country"...DODGY. IMMEDIATELY PUT OFF... "Yeah I'm off to Vegas on Wednesday, don't tell Mum, just say I'm going to Ibiza or something believable"...GETTING MORE DODGY..."Oh and how much cash can I take through customs?"...it was at this point luckily that my train arrived in York where I was due to change, and I was able to get off and get to the wine bottle, rather deserving one after those strange and quite irritating encounters!!

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