Few too many midriffs, interesting fashion senses and builders bums...must be a car boot sale!
If you've never experienced one then think yourself lucky, but last Sunday my sister made me attend the dreaded car boot sale. I was slightly cynical from the offset having had a bit of a late night and being somewhat hungover, but pleasant is certainly not the word that I'd use to describe this occasion.
As refreshing as getting up early on a bright Sunday morning is, setting up your stall among the pestering clientele asking for silver and golf clubs immediately isn't ideal. Just let us park before you nose around the boot of our car will you?
Then, as you attempt to arrange your wonderful tat in an orderly fashion so one would consider buying it, more bargain hunters flock to rummage through your not yet unpacked offerings. As much as you want them to leave you be while you set up, you think to yourself that the attraction is good and that it is a sign that you will have a successful day.
Next joke! As soon as you've set up and everything is looking wonderful, nobody seems interested and you sit patiently waiting for somebody to approach you and beg that they do - even wishing for the haggling of a £55 pair of jeans down to a few pounds. This really did happen. Yes, people want something for nothing but it's better to earn fifty pence from a Ming vase than hand it to a charity shop, right? That sounds awful but you know what I mean.
When people do finally loom into your delightful looking display, you eye up the designer clothes and hope that they will go for over thirty pence. This is nothing compared to the amount you originally paid and they look away. No, apparently a totally useless jar which you got free from your Grandma's bake sale looks more appealing. Or that awful makeup that came free inside a magazine.
Now ten pence up and a few pieces of toot lighter, feeling slightly accomplished at having shifted some bulk but completely gutted at the financial loss, you look around. THE SIGHTS YOU SEE. I mean, there are a few 'normal' folk wandering around too, looking for antiques, or curtains. Real niche things that car boot sales offer. But there are also some extraordinary sights. The amount of odd dress senses that we saw was incredible. A man in hot pants and a barber jacket while the rain spat down from above and the breeze made even myself chilly who was appropriately wearing jeans and a coat. Or a lady crouched down looking at a rack of CD's with the world's biggest builders bum. Or the slightly overweight girl who thought it a good idea to show this by revealing her midriff which showed at the bottom of a stained top.
I'm not entirely mean and did love some of the characters that visited our stall but after sitting there on Sunday morning thinking 'I could/should be in bed', I went home £13 up and thought 'I've got to write about this'.
As refreshing as getting up early on a bright Sunday morning is, setting up your stall among the pestering clientele asking for silver and golf clubs immediately isn't ideal. Just let us park before you nose around the boot of our car will you?
Then, as you attempt to arrange your wonderful tat in an orderly fashion so one would consider buying it, more bargain hunters flock to rummage through your not yet unpacked offerings. As much as you want them to leave you be while you set up, you think to yourself that the attraction is good and that it is a sign that you will have a successful day.
Next joke! As soon as you've set up and everything is looking wonderful, nobody seems interested and you sit patiently waiting for somebody to approach you and beg that they do - even wishing for the haggling of a £55 pair of jeans down to a few pounds. This really did happen. Yes, people want something for nothing but it's better to earn fifty pence from a Ming vase than hand it to a charity shop, right? That sounds awful but you know what I mean.
When people do finally loom into your delightful looking display, you eye up the designer clothes and hope that they will go for over thirty pence. This is nothing compared to the amount you originally paid and they look away. No, apparently a totally useless jar which you got free from your Grandma's bake sale looks more appealing. Or that awful makeup that came free inside a magazine.
Now ten pence up and a few pieces of toot lighter, feeling slightly accomplished at having shifted some bulk but completely gutted at the financial loss, you look around. THE SIGHTS YOU SEE. I mean, there are a few 'normal' folk wandering around too, looking for antiques, or curtains. Real niche things that car boot sales offer. But there are also some extraordinary sights. The amount of odd dress senses that we saw was incredible. A man in hot pants and a barber jacket while the rain spat down from above and the breeze made even myself chilly who was appropriately wearing jeans and a coat. Or a lady crouched down looking at a rack of CD's with the world's biggest builders bum. Or the slightly overweight girl who thought it a good idea to show this by revealing her midriff which showed at the bottom of a stained top.
I'm not entirely mean and did love some of the characters that visited our stall but after sitting there on Sunday morning thinking 'I could/should be in bed', I went home £13 up and thought 'I've got to write about this'.
Comments
Post a Comment